It is not enough that wine is paired with particular dishes. It is not enough that special glasses have been developed for drinking/tasting specific wines. I have also heard of tastings being done to the accompaniment of different music, which tricks the tasters into experiencing the same wine differently.

No, the epicurean world has breached new levels in absurdity. I don’t deny for a second that these things don’t produce a tangibly different taste experience, but for goodness sake, a tasting of cutlery! Apparently, cod and zinc don’t get along so swimmingly, but copper and mango are fabulous mouthfellows. Gold is excellent for sweet things (in my house, this would remain a theory).

If the inappropriate dish is being eaten, this is one occasion when it would be a disadvantage to have been born with a silver spoon in one’s mouth!

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At our premises we have about 800 square metres that can be configured almost any way you can imagine. The only restriction (sadly) is late-night music. We’re easily accessible from three of the major freeways servicing Cape Town, with secure parking right outside the front door.

Think of it as your Room of Necessity (as in Harry Potter). Whether it’s an all-day conference, a film shoot, or even something lasting just a couple of hours, please give us a call.

We’ve posted some pictures (here), but bear in mind that this was just one configuration.

I am usually wary of attempting a recreation of someone’s favourite restaurant meal, especially without the benefit of a proper recipe. But, when the request is being made by my dearest darling daughter, in her birthday week, how can I refuse?

So, yesterday afternoon I got stuck into the kitchen, making Chicken Katsu with curry sauce and sticky rice, which she had eaten at Wagamamma. The boys wisely disappeared to a forest somewhere in search of mushrooms (for all I know they went to the movies, because they returned empty-handed), leaving me to work through a three-page recipe (including the method).

On a trip to Tokyo a few years ago I had eaten Katsu for lunch. Basically, it’s deep-fried chunks of chicken, and the version we had was quite delicious. The Wagamamma version calls for frying entire chicken breasts that have been crumbed with panko.

The curry sauce includes Granny Smith apples and bananas, which made me a bit dubious about the whole thing. Basically, anyone who doesn’t like the taste of cooked banana in their dinner would be in trouble.

Overall, the meal was a success, and the sauce actually worked well (banana and all), although the husband irritatingly pointed out that perhaps I should have had the sauce around the sticky rice, rather than spooning it over the crispy chicken, thereby making it soggy.

Um, yes, but thank goodness we weren’t planning a mushroom risotto for dinner.

Anyone who knows me even casually would know that, after about six or seven in the evening, I am certain to be found in the close proximity of a glass of red wine. In fact, during my first pregnancy my gynae allowed me to maintain a moderate consumption, on the basis that the stress caused by abstinence would be more damaging.

I am sure that the company who provide our waiters train their team about my red wine requirement (a glass at the end of the evening, when the work has been completed) before they teach them how to carry a tray.

I’m happy to drink it, but red wine is almost always sold within a couple of years of the vintage. Good wines are nice to drink at every stage of their lives, but it makes a huge difference to have one that’s mature. I say this apropos the 2005 Lynchpin, which is currently the subject of a special offer at Cloofwines.co.za, and seriously delicious. It’s quite a grown-up style of wine, which makes a change from the chunky young shiraz (nothing wrong with that) that seems to find its way into my glass most often.

Now you can take Tuesday nights off … and save over 60% in the process!

Dish’s spice girls cook a butter chicken that lays claims to being one of Cape Town’s finest curries. Paired with basmati rice and a deliciously flaky roti, it makes a fabulous meal. And good value at R65 per person, even if we say so ourselves.

Simply order our four-person butter chicken meal, complete with rice and rotis, for only R100.

Place your order on Monday for home/office delivery, or on Tuesday mornings (by 10.30 am) for collection at Dish (this offer is available for deliveries on Tuesdays only).

Click here to order now.

One of our favourite events of the year is the Fleur du Cap Theatre Awards (being held on 20 March), for which we’ve done the catering for several years. In keeping with the performances and people being recognised, the entire event is jam-packed with the most wonderfully stimulating creativity.

The excellence of the theatrical component, as well as the event itself, stretches us to come up with food that is going to do justice to the real stars of the night. This year we are cooking to the Fleur du Cap theme “nature meets craftsmanship”.

Fleur du Cap’s standard offerings are reliable, well-priced and widely available, but you should try something from Fleur du Cap’s Unfiltered range (we have the Unfiltered Merlot on the wine list at Sidedish Theatre Bistro). It is at this end of the range that the nature and craftsmanship thing really shines.

Unlike many A-list events, this is one that has limited space for interested members of the public, at a giveaway R150 per person. Not only do you get to participate in a glamorous event, with performances by David Kramer and other leading lights, but Fleur du Cap wines and our canapés are also included. You can book via Computicket, or by phoning 021-4217695.

I’ve previously mentioned my participation in Liam Tomlin’s cooking course (yes, it is a bit late for the owner of a catering business to learn to cook, but better late than never). The first of his dishes I used at home was Singapore Chicken Rice, which has appeared on the home menu on a regular basis.

Two weeks ago I was so impressed with his gnocchi dish that I was determined to try it at home. When writing menus for clients’ events, I often include gnocchi, because it’s something that Chef Arno and his team are totally on top of. Anyone walking into my home kitchen on Wednesday last week would have wondered whether the gnocchi dough hadn’t, in fact, got the better of us. I had Aedan’s assistance in choking the gnocchi beast into submission, then the neighbours’ daughter, and still chaos abounded.

Eventually, at the irresponsible dinner time of something after nine, and a fortune’s worth of truffle oil and prosciutto later, we sat down to dinner. Our plates were lovely, but the kitchen floor was covered in a snow storm of flour (and our Weimaraners were white instead of their usual tan grey).

So, from this week, blanched gnocchi will join the line-up at Dishfoodmaket.com. Had I grown up beside a nonna who made her own I’d probably regard it as a quick and easy thing to knock together. However, as a woman the wrong side of 40 trying it for the first time, I’d have to class homemade gnocchi in the same category as stuffed mushrooms. Buy it in, darlings. That’s what credit cards are for!

For more years than I care to remember, I haven’t needed to worry about my Met outfit. It’s been a chef’s jacket. My only other experiences of attending the Met go back to the early days of our marriage, when we used to run a ‘picnic’ for 100-odd people. That also involved a lot of work.

I was at the J&B Met on Saturday, purely to enjoy the day, which I certainly did. From a business perspective, I do need to wish for future work at the event, but it was sooo nice to just have fun. My outfit even included a hat, but for someone as inquisitive as I am it was a huge disability, because my field of vision was so limited. Next time (if I ever wear a hat again) it will be more garnish than umbrella. I know exactly how a horse wearing blinkers must feel. Speaking of which, the men in our party could have done with sets of those.

We were delighted to find numerous taxis available to take us home. Apart from his size, our driver wouldn’t have a future as a jockey; we told him Vredehoek (to gatecrash friends’ romantic dinner at Sidewalk Cafe), but he tried to head for Fishhoek, which pretty much sums up my day’s gambling as well.

I’ve never been scared of going shopping – not even ‘chore’ type shopping, like groceries and cleaning stuff. My family has learnt, though, that it’s best to arm me with a shopping list (funny that!). You see, I get it into my head that we’re short of something, then for several consecutive weeks I’ll stock up on that item, which means we are then well and truly stocked up on that item.

So, yesterday’s list also indicated a number of items I was not to buy, just in case I had a moment of uncertainty somewhere in the supermarket (bloody hell!). My family includes a couple of environmental activists, so “local” was clearly indicated next to Veg and Fruit (apparently Peruvian artichokes have caused the water table to drop by something like 8 metres, and then there’s the issue of Aphrodite’s spears getting transported by aircraft).

They should have sent me out with an atlas. The only local green vegetable on Woolies’ shelves was broccoli. Everything else was from Kenya and other African countries (pleased that the locals are getting some employment, though). My assumption is that Woolies is the worst culprit as far as this is concerned, but we’ll be checking out the competitors over the next few weeks.

I was also instructed NOT to buy any meat, chicken or bacon, and it was striking how much less the tally came to. It seems that vegetarianism is the only way forward. If only I can find a reliable supply.

My introduction to the world of ‘hospitality’ came via a variety of waitressing jobs. The first of these was at a steakhouse in Meadowridge, and involved an unlucky diner getting a plate of food on their chest and lap. I tripped as I got to the table, which resulted in one or other of Newton’s Laws taking control of the steak, chips and sauce.

I spent at least ten years of my waitressing career at Buitenverwachting, where I once responded to a guest’s question about the meaning of the property’s name as “waiting outside”, rather than ‘beyond expectation’.

The opening of Sidedish Theatre Bistro at Theatre on the Bay has seen me back in action, as a result of getting let down by staff at the last minute. It’s been fun, and thankfully no-one has had to sit through Evita with the residue of red wine jus and sirloin on their theatre attire.

No reviews have yet been published; my greatest fear is not that someone will criticise the food, but that the waitress gets described as “ageing”. So, please, if you know of competent waiters/waitresses, send them in our direction.